One of the most emotionally charged questions parents often ask when going through a divorce or custody dispute is: Can my child choose which parent to live with? It’s understandable—children are at the heart of these decisions, and their preferences matter. However, while a child's wishes may be considered in Utah, they are not the deciding factor.
At Pearson Butler, we know how complex custody issues can be. Here's what you need to know about how your child's age and maturity level may influence custody decisions in Utah.
Utah Custody Basics: What the Courts Consider
In Utah, the court's primary focus in custody decisions is always the child's best interest. Judges consider several factors, including:
- Each parent’s ability to care for the child
- The emotional bond between parent and child
- Stability of the home environment
- History of domestic violence or substance abuse
- Willingness of each parent to support the child’s relationship with the other parent
The court may also consider the child’s preference—but it’s only one piece of the puzzle, and its weight depends mainly on the child’s age and maturity.
Is There a "Magic Age" in Utah?
Utah does not set a definitive age at which a child can legally choose where to live, unlike some states with a specific age. However, state law allows a judge to consider the child’s preference if the child is of sufficient age and maturity to make a reasoned choice.
Generally, judges may begin giving more weight to a child’s opinion around 14 and older, though this can vary. For younger children, preferences are often viewed as less reliable, especially if there are signs of coaching or manipulation by either parent.
That said, a child never has the sole authority to choose. Even a mature teenager’s preference will be balanced against other factors to ensure the decision supports the child’s long-term well-being.
How the Child’s Preference Is Heard
Children are not asked to testify in court in most cases. Instead, their preference is typically shared through:
- A custody evaluator (a professional who interviews the family and makes recommendations)
- A guardian ad litem (a court-appointed advocate for the child)
- A private interview with the judge, conducted in chambers
This protects the child from being caught in the middle or feeling forced to choose between parents publicly.
What If My Child Refuses to Visit the Other Parent?
If you already have a court order in place and your child resists or refuses visitation with the other parent, it’s important to understand your responsibilities. Court-ordered custody and visitation must be followed, regardless of your child’s preference—unless and until the order is officially modified.
If your child is old enough, you can petition the court for a modification based on a change in circumstances. But until then, both parents are expected to encourage and enforce the parenting plan.
Failure to do so—even if your child objects—could lead to serious legal consequences, including being held in contempt of court.
Navigating Custody Issues with Care
Children’s voices do matter, especially as they grow older. However, in Utah, their desires are only part of the broader legal picture. Whether you're preparing for an initial custody hearing or seeking a modification, understanding how the court views child preference can help you make informed, thoughtful decisions.
Utah Child Custody Lawyer
Custody decisions are deeply personal—and deeply legal. If you have questions about how your child’s age or preference might affect your custody case, the family law team at Pearson Butler is here to help. Contact us today at (800) 265-2314 to schedule a confidential consultation and learn how we can guide you through Utah’s custody process with compassion and clarity.